Just say it

“I’m not sure about what happened in that meeting. I asked if they were OK with what we agreed to and they each said yes. But I’m not convinced.”

Does this ever happen to you? I have this conversation with a coaching once a week, on average.

My response never varies: “Say to them what you just said to me. Say, ‘I know you say you agree with this, but I’m not convinced.'”

Often, I hear this: “I wanted to tell them that this can’t work. I wanted to say that the what they asked me to do is not only impossible, it will get them a result exactly opposite the one they want.”

“What stopped you?”
“I could never say that.

And then, you do say that, but not to the person who needs to hear it and not at the time it could do some good.

A participant once came up with a ground rule I love:  This is the cab ride home.  This meeting, this conversation, this moment.